| Holy Father, I am in need of You
Holy Father, I am in need of Your touch
You've rescued me from my deepest days and my darkest nights
I want to fall in love with You
I want to live my life with You
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| We shall see what tomorrow may bring. |
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| "True to your word, you let me catch my breath and send me in the right direction." ~Ps. 23:3 msg |
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| 5/1
12:29am marks the moment of the broken still quiet silence of this first day of May. Finally you've reached out to touch my face and a smile has returned to my step. In one week, I will see you in three dimensions... I will hear your laugh in stereo and I will feel your heart beat with mine. I can barely contain my excitement at just the mere thought of this actually being all true. 4/26
Sometimes I feel so unsettled and that somehow if I picked up everything and moved; started over; changed something; that it would change my heart. How deceiving our heart is to our thoughts. True; changing surroundings/environment can spark change on the inside as well, but it will only do so much til we find ourselves back where we began even though we may be miles away. I get so anxious thinking about the future, but it's only when things don't seem to the way I envisioned. I see something in my path I want it. I reach for it, but it's just barely out of my reach... it could help me a bit and take a step in my direction, but somehow for now it is ok with just conveniently interrupting my life here and there. It's hard to let go of something you want so badly, but its even harder to be caught in the middle of a confused mind. This time I'm not gonna turn around unless you decide I'm what you want. |
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| I'm driving in a place I've been before but over night they have changed the roads and I can't figure out right from left. My turn signals have grown dim and no one can predict my next move to tell of the likely danger. I'm dodging cones of orange wishfully scattered to warn. Red lights power on and off to stop me, but is it enough? The direction I'm used to has been barricaded with a mountain of hypocrisy - maybe I should pull over and start climbing? Do you see my confusion through the stormy-weather glass or have you been lulled to sleep by the distractions of your own life? I scream for help but there are no answers. My brakes have worn thin; too many choices with no choice to end. |
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